I'd like to fling something.

This weekend is the annual Spring Fling here at the kids' elementary school. It's a fundraiser put on by the PTA (or some-such like that.) It has a couple of blow-up bouncy thingies and each classroom has a "booth" that the parents volunteer to man for half hour time periods. (They call them booths, but they are mostly just long tables set up with games and things like that.) Let me go on the record as saying that I HATE THESE THINGS.

Last year I volunteered my husband for the hot dog cooking "booth" and he did a dandy job, even staying longer when they needed extra help. So this year when the form came home for volunteers, I was all set to sign my husband's name up until I saw the name of the booth for my son's class: Fingernail Painting. Man, way to ruin my plans! Now I had two choices, I could either volunteer myself, or I could just not volunteer at all and pretend I never saw the form. As tempting as feigning ignorance sounded, I actually signed myself up.

So I figured that was that and promptly forgot all about the second child who is now also in school and would need to have a parent volunteer at her booth too. I forgot, that is, until the room mom called me and asked if we could help out. They didn't have enough people signed up yet and needed the help. Well, shoot, I thought. So I signed us up. Us being me or my husband, hoping I could get him to fill in for me because I HATE THESE THINGS.

My daughter's classroom booth is Go Fish, or something like that, which I figured would be fine for my husband to work. And he doesn't mind. He's good at these sorts of things. I'm not. I hate the crowds and all the noise. Mostly, I don't like the crowds. And the thought of sitting there painting little girls' fingernails, hand after hand after hand of them, strikes fear into my heart. It really is not my cup of tea. And I kind of feel sorry for the girls because my fingernail painting skills are sorely lacking. What do you think the odds are that I can teach my husband to paint nails before Saturday? Yeah, that's what I think too.

Did I mention I HATE THESE THINGS?